Now our cat is a huge couch potato, weighing in at at least 300 cat pounds. Getting her to move was a challenge any day. Blimpo usually ignored all toys, but this little red light was to her liking. She could lay and look at it, and when it moved it was unpredictable.
She chased it up the armchair, leaped to the couch, across the couch, and down onto the floor, moving so fast she was skidding all over the place. I got so engrossed that I was laughing. The light kept jiggling and so did the cat.
From the other room I heard swearing start, followed by, “What the heck?” Those weren’t his exact words, but close enough for a mother to repeat.
Cat and I kept playing. It was as good as a flashlight was when she was a kitten and could actually move.
“Who’s playing with my mouse?” My son yelled.
“Your cat is.” I ran the little red light across the carpet. “Besides, how do you know? You can’t see it.”
“Stop it. I’m trying to type in here and the letters are ending up all over the page.”
“Okay.” I turned it over and was trying to figure out how to turn it off, when the cat jumped on me and clawed her way up my back.
“Put the mouse down with the light down so the cat can’t see it, and come here with your hands up. I’m trying to get my assignment done and you’re not helping.”
You’re no fun, I said. But my devious mind was thinking.
computer mice could take mousing to a whole new level. What cat wants to chase a real mouse when they can chase these little red things and not have to deal with a disgusting carcass afterwards? I suspect it won't take long before all mice will realize that they are perfectly safe. Cats will no longer be chasing the non-technology mice. Mice will overrun the area crawling over napping cats to hijack the food in people’s houses.
Then some brilliant inventor will realize that cats can be useful and entertaining if the cats actually chased real mice. He will find some way to have a mouse use little infrared lights for headlamps. People will have to buy those little headlights and put them at the door to their house with a sign that says,
“Food detecting device. Please put on before entering.”
Once inside, the chase will be on. Fat cats, and dead mice, just like in the olden days.
As for me, I’m going to make a cat exercise toy for the 21st century. It is a computer desk with a Plexiglas top equipped with an infrared mouse. That way I can exercise Blimpo with the flick of my wrist while I’m typing. It’s the only rodent I’ll let in my house – a techno mouse.